Obedience is always best

I am having a hard time lately getting my 2 year old son to listen. He doesn't listen, he gets in trouble, I get angry, and they cycle repeats. I find myself getting down on my knees at eye level with him and telling him "if you will just listen to mommy and do what mommy says, you won't get in trouble." I said these words today and then something, (we will call it the Holy Spirit, which is most likely what it was)hit me hard, like a spiritual smack in the head and told me "if you are disobedient, there will be consequences." I am fighting with God right now. Maybe it is not ok to say that, but it is what is going on. I am fighting him like a stubborn child in the an area where he wants me to be obedient. I keep messing up and there are certain consequences, and yet, I won't stop doing what I am doing (or not doing what I should be doing in this case.) When I am obedient, he will bless me. When I am disobedient, there will be consequences. Why will I not just listen and do what he says? Why do I think that my way is best? Why do I think that he will reward me for giving into my flesh and doing what I want? I read a quote by Joyce Meyer that said "Obedience becomes the natural fruit of the love that you have for God." If obedience is the natural fruit of my love for God, what does disobedience say about my love for him? Does being rebellious mean that I don't love him? If I give into my flesh instead of being obedient to God, am I saying that I don't care what he wants? In a sense I believe I am. I am saying that what you want doesn't matter to me, I am going to do things my way anyway. That is extremely convicting and makes me feel horrible. I strive to be obedient, but I cannot seem to be successful. Paul said in Romans 7:15-20 "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. 16 And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. 17 As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. 18 For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature.[a] For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. 19 For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. 20 Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it." Basically this is saying that I want to do what is right, but because I am a sinful person, I cannot do what I want to do. My heart is for God. I love God. I want to live for him. I want to serve him. I desire to do what he wants for me, and yet my sin and my flesh get in the way and make it difficult. Notice I did not say "make it impossible." We are in a war, and we have to fight our flesh and the enemy (satan) to be able to do what is right. We may lose some battles, but as long as we don't give up and let them win the war, we still have a chance to do what is right. This gives me hope. Every day that I get up and choose to fight, and choose to be obedient, there is still hope for me. Obedience is always the best choice. Not always the easiest, but ALWAYS the best.